So, as of this writing we are on day 33 of the partial government shutdown. Before I get too far into this let me tell you about my political beliefs. I am sure Bo Nur Wood will be pissed since we aren’t supposed to be political but if you don’t understand this heartless bastard, you won’t understand where I am coming from. I am devoutly conservative in my FISCAL beliefs. We have a Constitution that separated our powers and granted very specific things to the FEDERAL Government and everything… EV-RE-TING (That’s a joke.. get it or not. Fuck off!)… else was the responsibility of the STATES. With the very firm belief we that had some pretty fucking brilliant founding fathers who set it up that way, I am amazingly very, VERY, VERY socially liberal. You want to marry a someone of the same sex? Go for it. You want to smoke weed? Do it. You want to have two wives and a live-in maid who washes your nut sack every Thursday? Good on you, wish I could get away with it. Just don’t ask me to pay for any of it.
We have shut off funding to programs because two sides of the same coin have decided they are going to vote against each other to see who looks like the biggest asshole come 2020. Let there be no mistake, that is what is happening. People who voted for a wall under a different president voted against it and to keep the government running now. People who voted against a wall under a different president are now saying it is not vital to national security and we are in a crisis. Both sides are pointing at each other as being unbending and obstructionists. I can’t prove it, but I bet when they walk off the floor of the House or Senate, they go grab a beer, laugh up the fact that they are still all getting paid, their staffs are still getting paid, they are all enjoying the perks of office, and will be for a very long time (everyone wants to get rid of the career politicians, just not THEIR career politician).
So, I’m sitting here. You know there are some seriously loyal people who are working and not getting paid. My step brothers in the DHS are on their second payday without being paid, but they are guarding our coasts and rescuing stupid people who saw a video on how to sail but don’t know how and doing everything the USCG has done since 1790. Moesha at the TSA is still threatening a body cavity search if you forgot to take your shoes off at the airport. Jokes aside, our airports are open, our boarders are being manned, our customs inspected. There are literally hundreds of thousands of good, hard working Americans doing their duty and not knowing when their paycheck will come.
Other than that, I don’t know of anything major that has happened. I haven’t tried to go hang with Yogi and Bobo in Jellystone, so maybe the parks are closed. I have heard that people have volunteered and picked up trash to keep the memorials in Washington from becoming D.C.’s City Dump Central, so I guess there is that… but has anyone not employed by the U.S. Government noticed a disruption in life?
And we come back to I am fiscally conservative, socially liberal, and our founders were pretty fucking smart. What the fuck are we spending all this money on if we haven’t had an Earth Shattering Kaboom after almost 10% of a year without these “vital services?” I mean in military terms, if you decimate the enemy you have, literally, destroyed 10% of it. Our government has been decimated and nothing seems to have happened. Well, I will admit it is a partial shutdown and people are working without pay, so maybe not exactly, but there are whole sections that aren’t working and … well, shit, my taxes are still being collected. Maybe we need 2 amendments. 1) If the government is shut down, the first branch to be furloughed shall be the IRS. 2) Congress and their staffs will go without pay, and it will not be restored, for the entire period of the shutdown.
If we take the government’s revenue source, and deny the pay, perks and privileges to the fuckers who are supposed to be running this circus, maybe those monkeys will stop throwing shit at each other and get back to playing the grinder.
Anyway, I guess if it was easy even a caveman could do it… wait, I’ve heard some of them speak… maybe it is that easy.
‘What a field-day for the heat
A thousand people in the street
Singing songs and carrying signs
Mostly say, hooray for our side’
Now, Go Fuck Yourself.
Article written by: DV Tinman - Residential Naval Tube Expert & DV Mod
Jan. 25, 2019 - UPDATE: Due to my metal fingers and brain, I meant to have this article to you sooner but I actually wrote this this morning. While I done so, The Don decided to go ahead and make a speech about a three week "pause" of this shutdown. Let's see what happens over the next three weeks and I may revisit this in another article.
The U.S. Air Force responded back in July and stated, “Any attempt to illegally access the area is highly discouraged.” Hosts of the event have a plan though! “If we Naruto run, we can move faster than their bullets. Lets see them aliens."
P.A.O. Twatwaffle Friday, September 20, 2019Read more